He introduced me to a new kind of joy, one I had never experienced before. The day-to-day tasks of childcare didn’t feel laborious I enjoyed them.Īnd it kept getting better as Bode got bigger and more playful, full of so much expression. While outings to coffee shops and bookstores are enjoyable and needed, an afternoon spent at home is just as blissful to me. It’s become very clear that I’m a homebody at heart. Not only was I getting to know this new little human, but I was getting to know this new “me,” a new identity that revealed itself a bit more every day. Yes, I stressed over nap schedules, but in retrospect, it was a special, precious time. There were plenty of tears and worries, but overall I look back at those early weeks with my first baby with fondness. I wasn’t immune to the postpartum hormones and emotions though, don’t get me wrong. We quickly found our rhythm with Bode attached to me via the Solly wrap, playing, and giggling for hours, eagerly waiting for Daddy to return home at the end of the day for more family fun. I recovered quite quickly from my delivery and felt fabulous within a couple of weeks. Bode nursed well, slept through the night at 3 months old, and went days without crying. I was one of those lucky first-time mamas who had an “easy” first child. Once I gave birth to my first child, I realized I had little to worry about when it came to ‘losing myself’–becoming a mother helped me to find myself in a whole new way instead, clearer than I could have ever imagined. People speak of “losing yourself” when you become a mother, and I didn’t want to be one of those cases.īut once I gave birth to my first child, Bode, on April 27, 2017, I realized I had little to worry about when it came to “losing myself”–becoming a mother helped me to find myself in a whole new way instead, clearer than I could have ever imagined. I spent my 20s figuring out what I wanted, what I loved, what I valued… or so I thought. I didn’t want motherhood to change me all that much either-I overall liked who I was.
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